Notice of Love Inspection

Inspection Status Affection Confirmed

Official Inspection Notice

Main Inspection Notice

To protect your heart and the hearts of those around you, the Department of Heart Security (DHS) conducts routine inspections of emotional baggage.

During this process, selected hearts may be opened for review. Yours was identified for a full love inspection.

The inspection may have included a careful review of unspoken feelings, stored affection, unresolved tenderness, and other items requiring gentle handling.

Once the inspection was complete, all contents were returned to your heart in their original condition, with the possible addition of several affectionate thoughts.

If access to your heart was restricted, the Heart Security Officer may have been required to wait, proceed with care, and use patience, honesty, and kindness to gain clearance.

Heart Security regrets any temporary butterflies, unexpected tenderness, or lingering thoughts caused by this necessary act of emotional protection.

Attachment A

Inspection Findings Checklist

One unauthorized love note
Excessive affection
Reasonable amount of spicy thoughts
A high probability of missing you
Strong preference for your safe return
Evidence of smiling when thinking about you
Repeated desire to hear all about your trip
Persistent belief that you are wonderful

Attachment B

Evidence Locker

Exhibit A: Your laugh

Classification: Repeatedly observed to compromise operational focus.

Exhibit B: The way you tell stories

Classification: Noted as unusually effective at making time disappear.

Exhibit C: Being near you

Classification: Confirmed source of calm, warmth, and general disarmament.

Exhibit D: Your safe return

Classification: Highest priority. Non-negotiable.

Travel Advisory

Traveler is cleared for solo adventure.

Required actions

Have the best time
Take pictures of anything that makes you smile
Text me when you land
Come home safely
Return to Home Base when ready

Emergency Affection Contact

Love Inspection Desk

We appreciate your openness and cooperation. If you have questions, need reassurance, or just want to talk, please contact the Department of Heart Security:

Website: 🎩.ondejko.ro
Email: love@🎩.ondejko.ro
Toll-free: 1-800-LOVE-YOU
Direct: 1-800-MISS-YOU

Final Determination

You are insanely loved.

*Section 110(b) of the Affection and Emotional Safety Act of 2001, 49 U.S.C. 44901(c)-(e) (Hearts & Emotions Division)